Chat’s with Bill

My friend Bill – aka The Goober – lives in a straw bail house he built in the middle of nowhere in New Mexico with two kids and his super cool Welder Wife. We always have disturbingly strange chats… that generally go like:

goober: hi ben!

ben: morning goat fucker

goober: once you know goats you’ll never have sheep!

ben: so i’ve heard

goober: would you like to see our goats?

ben: i’m against anything living in cages – so i’d have to set them free
do you wear catholic robes whilst tending to the goats?


ben: NSFW goat pics

goober: nsfw?

ben: not safe for work – GOAT PORN

goober: the goats do get out to a pasture to rummage for weeds

ben: i’ve heard they make great lawn mowers

goober: and they fatten easily.

ben: do you actually eat your poor goats?

goober: yes

ben: that’s kind of sinister. i mean – there’s shooting some random person on the street (fun!) and then there’s raising a kid and eating him for dinner… that’s kind of fucked up

goober: do you eat meat?

ben: not meat that lives with me

goober: this is my victory garden in action

ben: huh? i’m afraid

goober: food production thats all. I try to not get attached to the short timers.

1 Comment

mattSeptember 7th, 2007 at 8:58 pm

I never heard of anyone eating goat meat.

But, in any case, I respect the Great Goober for his choices. He is a wise man, that Goober.